Blogging in E minor
Usually just a bunch of silly crap.

In Search of a New Hat

Hats signify position, power and status.

            We identify people by the hats that they wear. Hats can be part of a uniform. Firefighters wear firefighter hats, police officers wear policeman hats and Steak ’n’ Shake folks wear paper hats.

            Hats are symbols intended to provide easy recognition. The misapplication of this principle can lead to confusion, such as in the case of the hotel doorman who wears too ornate of a uniform and is mistaken for a foreign head of state.

            People wear identical hats to convey solidarity and unity, as demonstrated by pro baseball teams, Orthodox Jews, the NRA or the Ku Klux Klan.

            Frequently, hats symbolize leadership, such as in the case of the Native American chief in his feathered headdress. The Pope wears cool hats. The pope-like Eastern Orthodox dude wears even cooler hats. In general, religious leaders get away with wearing hats that would otherwise bring laughter and ridicule. Face it, if I were to show up to a job interview in a Flying Nun hat, I’d be shown to the door.

            Hats are fashionable; hats are fun! Hats convey style, individuality and a sense of humor. We should all wear more hats!

            I am told that hats are like underwear for the head. I have no idea what this means.

            I need a new hat. I’m in need an outward expression of my whimsical nature, my predisposition toward irreverence and my inner dorktitude. I seek a unique, symbolic testament to the creative forces within that will at the same time propel me in new existential direction.

            Simply wearing what everybody else is wearing just won’t do.

            At work, I “wear many hats,” yet actually wear none. Hat wearing in my profession is frowned upon. Instead, the hats I don are “rhetorical” in nature. I function in many — possibly too many — roles, hence the metaphor.

            Perhaps in my search for a new hat, I should seek an exciting, new hat-wearing role as well.

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One Response to “In Search of a New Hat”

  1. I have a new hat for you…and it’s perfect…

    http://www.zazzle.com/rock_star_hat-148966881799322656

    And underwear for the head? You don’t get that? Well,it’s like this; both are essentially unnecessary but they can keep you warm, and if you’re gonna wear either they both come in a lot of styles, sizes, and colors ~ and both say a lot about who is wearing them.

    Imagine a person wearing a really frothy pair of pink panties ~ now imagine that person is a man 😉 Doesn’t THAT say a lot about that person? heh Mr. Panty Man might wear a cop cap on his head (which also says something about him), but it’s what he wears on his bum that says even more 😀

    So glad I could clear that up for you.


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